covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
