I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
