Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
