I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I don't deserve a penis
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
