At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
