Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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