Did you just see the Batmobile???
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
