ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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