I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
last night I used snow as a chaser
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
