do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
