we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
