Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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