hotel room ftw
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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