Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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