I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You may now shotgun with the bride
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
