I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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