I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize