brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
