walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
