if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize