we're blogging at a bar
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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