We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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