I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
3pm strippers are depressing
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
