I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
