I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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