what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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