no. you can't hotbox the world.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
