You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
