Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
