no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
3pm strippers are depressing
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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