I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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