Where are you?
In a non slutty way
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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