it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
