Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
