just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
