Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Then you guys just all showered together...?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
