with your own penis?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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