I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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