i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
