Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
