Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
