Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Is it because I queefed?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
How external is "for external use only"?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Randomize
