I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
