sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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