I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Let's paint friendship bongs
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
