So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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