Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
foreskin is a definite game changer
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
