I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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