i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
