Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize