there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize