Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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